Category Archives: Beautiful Women

Booty

By Bill Donahue | Published: May 3, 2011

Agency unknown I’d say the number one concern women have with their bodies is that their asses aren’t quite as fat as they would like them to be. Many husbands and boyfriends share this concern. To wit: I recently overheard this conversation between a construction worker and diamond smuggler at a local watering hole “My [...]

Also posted in '10s, fragrance and fashion tv commercials, horrible lives, infomercials | 1 Comment

Art Thou Arty?

By Street Dude | Published: April 22, 2011

by Street Dude This is a wonderful commercial, I love this commercial, I love the music. This commercial is a part of me, truly. It’s one of those commercials that triggers visceral memories; the halcyon of my childhood; the halcyon of the year 1990. Todd Stewart (aka Steve Martin), the president of Art Instruction School, [...]

Also posted in '80s-'90s, fun times and entertainment, Lifestyle & Happiness | Leave a comment

A Final Farewell

By MR. FOOTBALL | Published: February 6, 2011

by Mr. Football Well team, football season is over and this super bowl fan had an awesome time. Mr. Football is going into hibernation. Until next year, this is Mr. Football saying good night and good pizza. This video is freakin’ awesome. Excuse me, I have some work to do. Rating: 30 Seconds of Heaven [...]

Also posted in '10s, dancing, Euro, football, fun times and entertainment, Naughty, sports, Super Bowl | Leave a comment

Contractually Obligated to Sneak a Little Creep Peek

By MR. FOOTBALL | Published: February 6, 2011

by Mr. Football “We are not doing it.” Chica babe, what are you talking about, we are contractually obligated to do all night long after you put on your Mack daddy makeup. So let’s just kiss and make up and get that box of Franza, pick up a few bags of Totinos, and put on [...]

Also posted in '10s, announcements, dancing, Drink, health and wellness, Lifestyle & Happiness, Music CD Compilations, sports, Super Bowl, toys | 4 Comments

Check Out the Rack on the Go Daddy

By MR. FOOTBALL | Published: February 6, 2011

by Mr. Football Now just because my name is Mr. Football does not mean that the team did not call me Mr. Pizza during my Freshman year. I ATE SO MUCH PIZZA, I HAD TO GEAR UP FOR TRAINING CAMP. Coach said ate pizza and lots of it. What are you looking at? You gotta [...]

Also posted in '10s, Drink, Food, football, health and wellness, inappropriate, Lifestyle & Happiness, Naughty, sports, Super Bowl | Leave a comment

In This Weather, Someone is Always Fucking Your Wife.

By Bill Donahue | Published: December 11, 2010

Especially if you own a Mercedes Benz. Who cares if your wife is cheating on you? You’re cheating on her too. With the magic of all-wheel drive, you can fuck whoever, you know? Anyway, this is clever in a kind of “Gift of the Magi” way, even if it does suggest that our society is [...]

Also posted in '00s, '80s-'90s, 'nsights, Bug Bug, control, Disgusting, electronics, Euro, fun times and entertainment, horrible lives, Stereotypes, technology and super computers, the Great Outdoors | 1 Comment

What Do You Matter, Dragon Got Your Tonque?

By kim-jung ill ation | Published: October 2, 2010

by kim-jun il-lation Now we don’t allow corn syrup in my country, call forth malaise, for very much that the matter, but if we did, we would not play this commercial, because we don’t have a free-circuit media in the DPRK. My news is permitted, whilst news that addresses the actuality realities of the matters [...]

Also posted in '00s, '10s, control, cute kids, Drink, Family, Food, Friends, health and wellness, Lifestyle & Happiness, politics | Leave a comment

“I’m Going to Get Into Your System”

By Street Dude | Published: July 25, 2010

“I’m going to get my hands on your data.” Chck, plicka, keyboard-chck chk, blk chica chica. Whence that onomatopoeia? One word: yourkompacpresariokomputerkeyboard or wordprocessor unit from the early ’90s. “I’m going to get into your system.” Once upon a time beofore the monumental cgi of the awe-inspiring film Titanic, a movie that made me cry [...]

Also posted in '80s-'90s, 'nsights, control, public service announcements, technology and super computers, verbose television reviews | Tagged | 5 Comments

Like Pepsi Throwback

By Bill Donahue | Published: May 28, 2010

Here’s a fun one. This Willie Horton ad is a classic. Notice how the words “Kidnapping”, “Stabbing”, and “Raping” appear on the screen. Michael Dukakis personally let Willie out of his cell. Willie kept saying “Mike, I cannot wait to get out of this jail cell so that I can commence with the rapin’” and [...]

Also posted in '80s-'90s, 'nsights, Drink, Family, fun times and entertainment, horrible lives, Racism, Religion | 3 Comments

Cotton Commercial: The Fabric of Zooey Deschanel’s Faultless and Fashionable Lifestyle

By Street Dude | Published: January 17, 2010

reviewed by Street Dude Lately, we at 30 Seconds of Hell (Street Dude, and Urban Pal) have been excessively soft with our reviews — too soft — and this cute and cottony commercial, featuring the adorable Zooey Deschanel, further perpetuates our pussy-ness as television commercial advertisement reviewers. Well, truth is, the big advertising firms slip [...]

Also posted in '00s, fragrance and fashion tv commercials, Lifestyle & Happiness | Tagged , | 3 Comments
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